Karkuri
by Suomalainenka
Summary: How would the world look like with just one male asari? Would it collapse or not? Certainly it won't be the same. The newest creation of human scietists gets out of control. What'll be its influence on the universe?


**Author's Note: **I decided to publish my first completed FF ever. I'm not entirely proud of it, but I need opinions on how I should improve my work. Well, as some of you have probably noticed, English is not my native language. This text was originally written in Polish and then translated by my boyfriend. Of course I could have done it myself, however I thought it needed some distance, so I just helped a little. To help me reduce language mistakes I'd appreciate you noting them for me. The text itself... it's quite long, but I decided not to divide it. I wouldn't know how. The title means 'deserter' in Finnish. I just love the language and decided to use it in a way. I'd like to thank you in advance for reading and every single review, I really need them. I hope you will enjoy the story.

- Yes, it is our most successful experiment.

- We are the first. It is a unique object.

- With such potential we will become the richest in the universe.

- No, we should not do this. We disturb the order of things. He should not exist. He has no right to be.

- Shut up! It is our secret weapon! Now we will overthrow the regime of the Citadel.

- Success is within our grasp. It is only a matter of putting our plan into effect.

Where...

Who...

What am I doing here?

They've sunk me in something?

Green liquid...

I have to get out...

Hitting with hands is of no effect, I have to...

More power, I... it hurts.

But it's close enough. I will make it, I will... I have to.

- What the hell is happening?

- He shouldn't be awaken yet!

- He regained the total control of himself. If we don't stop him, who knows, what will happen! He'll get through, we won't make it! Get ready to neutralize him!

Almost got it.

I see people, they're afraid of something. Of me? If so, now it's my only chance, only... oh no! They prepare weapons! Still... I have to try.

Yes! They look at me with awe when I land on the floor. I stand up slowly... one of them comes up but something controls my moves and in a moment a man wearing white apron lies without a move on the floor covered with this odd substance I was in a while ago. I can't control my frenzy anymore, I attack one after another. I hear a woman assaulting me from behind. In that moment I feel a sudden surge of power. Blue glow surrounds my arm magnifying the hit force. A moment after it was all over. I breathe deeply to calm down. I look around the demolished room. I see everywhere the destroyed tools of the scientists. I look back and see the tank in which I've been kept. Below I can read the inscription: „Object 56: Aulis". That's the name they gave me? So my name is... Aulis. Just who... no, what am I actually? I notice a mirror on the wall. I stand before it. I see dark, frightened eyes looking from a blue-colored face. White patterns running from the lower lip and expanding on the chin forms something of a human beard. I touch my head. Unlike the scientists I don't have hair but some sort of thick tentacles instead imitating it. They end in the vicinity of the back. I can't make them move. I notice suddenly that my thin body is naked. I look around the corpses lying on the ground. They are all clothed, covered with white aprons. I realize that my nudity is improper. I'm not sure if those people are alive. I pluck up enough courage to take off clothes from the nearest man. They're a bit too large but they'll do. Wearing black shirt, gray pants and quite clumsy shoes I start to look for a weapon. Unfortunately this belonging to the scientists is out of use. I recall that weird power I used earlier. It has to suffice for now. Unhurriedly I make for the door passing by the debris of devices and glass which was scattered all over the room at the moment of breaking the tank. When I reach the door, it turns out they are locked with code. Logical. They conducted here some experiments after all. Certainly illegal. I use a biotically reinforced blow to tackle the lock. I manage to leave the room but I don't know what to do next. I realize quickly that I won't escape from this place. I'm on a space station and can't leave. I don't any traces of vehicles. Resigned I sit against the wall. I just managed to free myself. Do I really have to... die of hunger and exhaustion... just like this?

The fourth day passes... there is no sign of a living creature nearby. I won't stand it.

Apparently I had to kill them.

The organism can't take it anymore.

I lie helpless and try to prepare for the approaching end.

Everything was in vain. All my effort I put to the liberation was completely pointless.

There is no hope for me anymore.

- Daddy, daddy! Look, there's somebody! A blue man!

- What? Oh my, what they've done to him? Layla, my dear, go to the kitchen, bring some water, something to eat and the thickest blanket. But do be quick, ok?

- Yes, daddy.

It's getting dark... I'm growing weak.

But it doesn't bother me anymore.

Maybe death will bring relief?

Maybe I wasn't supposed to be alive.

Something soft surrounds my body, it's getting nicely warm. This dying is not so bad after all.

Light is dazzling me. It hurts. Let it go out, please.

- 'Hey', I hear someone's voice. 'Drink some water or you'll die on me.'

Something's pouring into my sore throat. It has a fabulous taste.

The dark is clearing up. I see a human male's face above me. He has friendly features and black semi-long hair falling loosely on his cheeks.

- Can you sit? , he asks.

I nod. Water reinforces me. The stranger sits me carefully over the wall. I realize he wrapped a thick blanket around me. After all I shiver with cold.

- Don't worry, you'll recover. , he gives me a loaf of bread.

I greedly get the meal. Then I look around and beside the man I notice a girl. Ten years old at most. Her soft black hair is pinned in bunches. She smiles as if she knew me since always. Blue eyes sparkle cheerfully. She must be a daughter of this man.

- My name is Kai Rawson and this is my daughter Layla. , the man looks straight into my eyes, 'don't worry about anything now. We'll get you out of here.'

It's been six years since Kai saved me form that cursed station. I was worried that I didn't age a bit all that time. I still looked to not much than 20 years, counting by human standards. Little Layla was becoming a young woman before my eyes. She was now a merry 16-year-old. She was full of energy and bursting with optimism. She's become to me someone extremely important, a real friend and a kindred spirit.

In fact I don't know how old I am. After all I wasn't born naturally. I was created. I look like this since the very beginning. Worried by this fact I asked Kai about it. There were more and more signs of aging on his face. Wrinkles around the eyes deepened and the voice became slightly hoarse. I was worried that I don't change like them. My friend gave me an exhaustive response to my question. According to him I was a representative of an asari race. He was surprised by it because its main characteristic is that they are only women. However he quickly came to a conclusion that it could be the scientists' objective. To create a male asari and to distort the natural order of things in the universe. Kai explained to me that the representatives of this race are powerful biotics for whom the time flows differently. They can live for thousand years and sometimes even longer. Therefore he estimated I am just still young. He stated that I probably just became mature and may now be about 120 years old. I thought about it somehow astonished but also sad. People grow old fast... will I have to watch my friends die?

We live on Earth, home planet of these two. Layla's mother's dead for many years so father's bringing her up alone. It's admirable. She's a great girl. Yet Kai doesn't want her to fight. He wants her to live a normal, peaceful life. But he trains me with zeal. He constantly repeats that I have a knack for biotics.

'Will I get a weapon?' I asked during one of our trainings.

'You won't need it, my boy' Kay laughed quietly. 'If you get to control your biotic powers well, you'll be able both to defend yourself and to make a very powerful attack. You just have to fully engage in it. It's enough for today, get some rest.'

This man was a fatherfigure to me. Anyway, he treated me like his own son. Our three were like a well-matched family. I tried to be a good friend and student and also the best brother Layla could have. The only problem was that I was asari. The only man of this race. No matter how much I'd like to merge with the rest, I won't make it. It doesn't matter if I am among humans or asari. I'll always be an outcast.

'Hey, Aulis.' My dearest friend sat beside me on a bed. 'Quit thinking all the time and isolating yourself. What's wrong?'

'Nothing much' I reply being totally aware of the fact that I'm a bad liar which of course didn't escape attention of the bright girl.

'Oh, Aulis... you know that lying is your worst ability. So? Just don't tell that you got those I'm-an-irreformable-outcast-kill-me thoughts.'

'I see you know me through and through.'

I can't resist smiling. This young woman is always a balm to me, healing my deepest wounds. During these six years we've become really close to each other. I'm getting more and more afraid of it because my feelings towards her are slowly getting out of control and exceed the sacred brother's love. I'm saying again and again to myself that I cannot love her like this. After all we won't be able to grow old and die together. While she becomes adult and changes I'll still be looking like a 20-year-old for a long time. The power of this statement was slowly fading and I started to give up to those improper emotions. More and more. However I'm not able to grow apart. After all only thanks to her I'm able to be happy and to laugh. She's my light in the tunnel, sense of my artificially created life.

'Hey, you're boring when being so silent y'know?' her voice efficiently grounds me. 'Don't worry that much. You're no outcast, look around you. Dad loves you like his own son and I love you...'

She hesitates looking at me strangely, almost imploringly, and then she resigns. The usual enthusiasm comes back to her eyes and a cunning smile is drawn on her lips.

'... like a brother o'course' she finishes grinning at me.

'You bet, sis!' I ruffle her soft hair and for the next few minutes we pretend to fight among laughter and joy.

But my heart's raging. I enjoy every single opportunity to touch her. Even if it's just a fellow barging. This time something cracks up in me. I lift her gently and hug her intensely. Astonishment leaves her speechless for a while but she quickly goes back to her usual pugnacity.

'Are y'going to war, little brother?'

I sense some sort of uneasiness in her laughter. My heart's beating furiously. Could it be that this wasn't indifferent for her?

'No' I answer laughing. 'It's just 'cause. I like you.'

For one moment I'm afraid if I sound too nervous but Layla doesn't notice. Or she pretends she doesn't. Anyway I feel slightly relieved. I don't want to make her life harder. I don't want her to suffer because of me. I know for certain that I have to care for her, be her guardian.

Next four years went peacefully. Kai has trained me to be a powerful biotic who's able to defend himself and inflict considerable wounds. His daughter has grown to be powerful young woman who knows really well what she wants. She's now twenty years old and may pass as my contemporary. My feelings towards her haven't changed a bit. I still keep them on a tight rein but I'm constantly weakening. She attracts me with too powerful force. She's beautiful, resolute and full of charm. I'm in turn all the same. I still look the same as then, I still feel like a being not allowed to exist. I want to live exactly because I love my mentor's daughter.

The slam of the door announces Kai's return. I feel I have to speak with him. Maybe he'll be able to help me somehow. I spurt and run to the corridor. What I see causes me to unwittingly cry out loud.

My teacher falls to his knees. Blood flows down on his hands. He falls.

'KAI!' , I her my voice and run forward.

I fall to my knees to localize wounds.

'Leave it, son', I hear his quiet words, 'It's too late for this. There's little time so listen carefully.'

I'm bringing ear closer to his lips to hear well.

'Other asari... you can't... they can't find you because they'll destroy... they'll kill you. And you... you mustn't die, Aulis. Layla needs you. You have to... take care of her... I believe in you because... I see what she feels towards you. Don't disappoint her... it's the only thing I want you to ask for. Love her like... like she loves you and... if she asks you about that... but only then... teach her to fight. Above all... make... make her that joyful. Before... she met you she was...so sad and now... her eyes are laughing. She... means the world to me so... protect her... at all costs.

'DAD!' Layla falls to her knees beside me.

Tears flow on her cheeks. Before minute lasts, I start to cry.

'My sweet daughter' the man's fading voice's fighting for the last words, 'don't fight your feelings. You'll only suffer that way. Be happy, I don't want anything else. I wish luck to both of you.'

The head inertly drops on the ground. The last breath escapes his body.

'D... dad...'

Her suffering tears me into pieces. Being helpless I watch her desperate crying. I don't try to fight with tears either. I loved this man like my own father. He saved my life. He gave me happiness I couldn't even dream of... and now he's gone.

I don't know how much time passed before the girl stood up. She looks into my eyes and fall straight into my arms. I hug her strongly and stroke her hair. She moves back a little to look at my face. I wipe a tear flowing on her warm cheek. She's so pale I start to worry if she won't fall ill. But her gaze is determined and full of stubbornness. The look softens after a while.

'Dad was right,' she says quietly and moves hand on my neck, 'I shouldn't fight for so long with it.'

My heart is raging again. I know already that I won't resist any longer. Maybe it's just an impulse and later she won't want to have much in common with me but emotions prevail.

The kiss tastes salty. We both cry and tears mix up in our lips. Layla grasps my face. The experience is so intense that my cheeks burn painfully. I weave my fingers through her hair greedily seizing each touch, each dab of lips, each breath. United with common tragedy we're lost in our intimacy. I don't want to let her go. I'd love to be always able to hug her protecting from sorrow and suffering.

It seemed like ages have passed before we split. I'm afraid of her reaction. Will she shout at me, call me names and hate me? One little gesture stops my thoughts. I feel her hand in mine and then I hear whisper in my ear:

'There's only you left for me. Promise me, please, that you won't leave me.'

'I promise.'

After all of this... I don't know what to do. Kai didn't manage to tell me what and where attacked him. It was perilous to stay here but where could we possibly flee? We've nobody apart from each other. We know no one. Layla may not stand out from the rest but I'm distinct as hell. I won't allow her to go alone, I can never let that happen. I promised her that. I can fight but she can't. According to my teacher's last will, I can't teach her to fight unless she asks for it. Besides... I wouldn't like to do it until it's necessary. I know she'd be a good warrior. She's extremely smart and gifted. However... Kai wanted her to live a normal life. I don't want to change it. But... her world has already fallen apart. She lost her father.

My head spins from hundred of thoughts. I cover my face with hands to stop this odd feeling.

'Auli', Layla looks at me anxiously.

I noticed that she had recently started to shorten my name this way. Her gentle voice make it sound so soft it quickens my heartbeat.

'Yes?'

'Are you alright?'

'Yes. I'm feeling a bit dizzy, that's all.'

'Auli... d'you think we can stay here?'

'I don't know, Layla. For now we have no choice. We can't leave this place without a well prepared plan and we have none for now.

Her look disturbs me much. She's worried. I smile to cheer her up.

'Don't worry. I'll defend you here for now. I'll come up with something, you'll see.'

'But... Auli...', she grabs my arm, 'I don't want you to defend me. Because defending me... you could die.'

I'm grinning.

'Don't worry, I won't get myself killed so easily.'

Dizziness intensifies.

'Lie down', I hear calm order, 'I'll make something to eat, you'll get stronger.'

Her personality has grown stronger since her father's death. She could floor many only with her mind's power. For that I admire her and love even more. I'm glad I don't have to hide with this anymore and be absolutely frank.

I slowly lie in bed. An odd weakness overwhelms my body as if I had just run a great distance. It makes me wonder because up 'till now I was in excellent form.

It's been two weeks since Kai's death. I attribute the fatigue to the slowly falling emotions. I lie, take deep breaths to calm down eventually. Soon after, Layla comes back with a warm meal. She's a great cook so I eagerly start eating. Although the food is as always delicious, after several bites I start feeling sick. In the end stomach can't take it anymore and I throw up on the floor.

'Auli!', the scream of a frightened girl curdles my blood.

She slowly raises me to a sitting position and puts her hand to my sweaty forehead.

'You have a fever!',

from the corner of my eye I notice her crying. Despite the dismay she tries to keep calm.

'I'm not gonna let you die.'

She helps me to lie down again. I'd like to soothe her down somehow but I'm feeling worse and worse.

'Don't worry', I puff quietly. 'It's due to the overflow of emotions. It'll be okay in a minute.'

In defiance of my words, I'm starting to shiver. I'm instantly freezing. Layla wraps me tightly with a blanket and quilt but I'm still shivering. The mind's starting to be tired, external stimuli hardly reach me. I have an impression that every fragment of my body is painfully pounded. Eyes clench strongly against my will, I begin to chatter my teeth.

'Oh no, the temperature's rising', I hear as if from a distance, 'Please, don't fall asleep yet. Auli! Stay with me!'

I can't control the convulsions. My mind's giving up. With the remaining strength I barely feel that the girl puts a cold compress on my forehead. However, its effectiveness is close to none, apparently the fever is too high. As a counterweight something warm drips on my face. Could that be her tears? I'm out of energy, the thoughts fade away.

Something calls me upwards but quiet crying keeps me tightly on the ground. Somewhere in the consciousness I heard words _stay with me... stay_. These words... I feel that they are more important to me than heaven. However the darkness grabs me strongly with its arms. I strain to get out and follow the voice but I'm powerless. Fatigue overwhelms me. Maybe I should give up? But... this voice... is too important to me. I gather all the energy to disperse the darkness. Suddenly all senses are working perfectly again.

'Auli!', I hear voice full of relief and weariness.

I try to sit up but small hand keeps me tightly in horizontal position.

'Don't get up yet. Rest.'

I feel weak but I know that my life isn't in danger anymore. Eyes close and I fall asleep. However my sleep is restless. I have nightmares all along. Continuously I see Kai's face full with boundless grief because of inability to rescue him. I shout. The scream tears up my lungs.

'Auli!', I hear someone's cry.

Without any doubts, only one person addresses me that way.

'Auli, wake up! Do you hear me? Wake up, I'm begging you.'

I spring up to a sitting position but fatigue knocks me down again. I look at the Layla's frightened face.

'You've screa-screamed so loudly...' she stutters, 'was it a dream?'

'Yeah,' I reply, breathing heavily, 'Don't worry, it was just a nightmare.'

I know well that Kai didn't blame me for his death. After all he stopped me from trying to save his life claiming that what he had to tell me was far too important. Nevertheless, that dream keeps nagging me. Still, there's no time to think about it. It's necessary to think about my and Layla's lives, here and now. I don't really care about my fate. I shouldn't exist anyway. It's against the nature. I just want to do my duty to Kai's daughter and to his own will. I am to protect her and ensure her happiness and peace. But I realize perfectly that I'm not the one who's ought to stay by her side till the end. I won't be able to give her happiness because I don't age the same way. I knew that in order to achieve happiness, she'll have to love a human. When I create such occasion for her and am sure that she's safe... my mission here will come to an end. Thinking about it is painful. Not because I'll die eventually but due to my love towards Layla and the fact that it'll be very harsh for me to let her go. It costs me much to acknowledge this. I have no other choice. As long as I'm the only friendly person to her, I'll be with her, I'll care about her, I'll show warm feeling every moment. However... when she meets another man... with pain... but I'll get out of the way without demur. It's the only way to her being happy, anyway... it'll be easier for her to acknowledge my death. It's inevitable so it can't make her suffer too much. I won't let that happen. I can't. Because I love her so much, that's why.

'Auli?', the girl looks at me explicitly anxious. 'Everything's okay?'

'Yes,' I smile slightly. 'Everything's fine.'

'How d'you feel?'

'Much better,' I admit, 'These several hours of sleep served mi well.'

'Several hours? Auli... you were unconscious for over three days.'

'What? Three days? But... there's nothing bad happened that whole time, right?'

'See any changes around? Everything's alright.'

I see that her facial expression changes smoothly. She's worried about something.

'Auli...' words come to her with difficulty, 'd'you think asari know already about your existence?

'I don't know whether it's asari but... my existence is a lifesore to somebody. Otherwise Kai would be alive.'

The feeling of guilt in my voice is somewhat too distinct. The woman looks at me with indignation.

'Please, just don't feel guilty about his death.'

'Still... someone clearly wants to find me... why else could he be killed?'

'I don't know! But even if it was you, dad decided it was worth dying for you! In the end... he didn't let you dress the wounds, instead... he preferred you listened to him. Isn't it enough that you were extremely important to him?'

'You defend me, yet... I'm indirectly responsible for your father's death.'

'Stop it! A killer took him from me! When we're ready... we'll find him. Or the killer will fall into our trap. Murderers always go back to former crime scenes.'

'Besides...' I interfere, 'if they're looking for me... they should go back here all the more. But... we can't wait for it for too long or the killer will get away. A week more... a week and then... we'll look for asari.'

'But... you risk your life pushing yourself into their hands. After all... you're the only male asari, they won't treat you as their own.'

'I know that. Your father's will was clear: to ensure your safety. It became my life's goal. To make you safe, I have to solve the problem of my origin, this is a key factor. Therefore... I have to find asari. Now forgive me but... I have to train a bit.'

'Tr... train? Are you insane? You've barely recovered from illness and now... you want to train?'

'Don't worry, I feel fine now. Please, trust me a little.'

I stand up slowly. Legs unsteadily bear the body's weight. Feeling an upsurge of energy, I leave the house. I reach a place where I trained with Kai. He taught me many different tricks. However once he said something that made me think...

'Believe me, boy, you have the potential which goes much further than I can teach you.'

I look at my friend with doubt.

'But I'm still able to do little.' I say with bitterness. 'You're a different story, a powerful biotic with a great power.'

Kai laughs cordially tapping me on the shoulder.

'My power is nothing in comparison with what you can do. I won't be able to help you with that however. You'll have to learn for yourself how to use that power when the time comes. According to any sources, you're the only one who can master it. It's a technique of biotic blades. It's a weapon in itself. If you learn how to use it you'd become a tough opponent. It's a perfect defense and a good but not exact attack instrument. In the end you'll be able to use them when your mind is ready.'

I turn away to leave.

'Ah, Aulis! One more thing.'

I stop and look over my shoulder.

'When you master this ability, take a look in a wardrobe in my room. You'll find there something of use.'

'Why won't you give that to me yourself?'

'You're totally not the explorer type. Just do it on your own.'

He smiles somewhat sadly and leaves.

I try to get away from these memories but one thing still bothers me. Those words of his said before he left... and that uncertain smile... like he was aware of the fact that he'll die soon. Finally I come to a conclusion that time of reflections is to be postponed. Now I must focus on the training. I know that the key is the absolute concentration on externalizing the power. I clear my mind from all thoughts and try to draw out the inner strength. I feel the familiar warm in hands but the feeling fades away quickly. I try the whole time and the power is becoming stable. After a couple of hours it finally takes a specific shape. I look with awe at the effect. Bluish phantom blades adhere to both arms. They extend from hands, then disengage a bit from the body and their ends curve slightly behind the elbows. I strike several blows in the air. I'm amazed at the precision with which I can control them. As if I held swords or something in my hands. All of a sudden I notice drops falling on the lawn. I abort the ability and watch carefully my arms. Hands bleed from both sides. Insignificant pain now becomes to be a strong one. I know that Layla will professionally dress the wound but on the other hand she'll panic for sure. However I have to trust her skills. I direct my steps towards home. As I predicted, the girl's reaction is somewhat impetuous. I find out that I'm a thoughtless moron with no sign of imagination. I quietly accept the offences and let bandage my injuries. When finished, she lifts one of the wrapped hands and kisses gently a fingertip and looks into my eyes. I lose breath for a moment. From that moment of passion after Kai's death there was nothing between us, although the atmosphere around us is full of love. Now I look at her uncertain of what should I do. The answer comes quickly. The familiar touch on the neck explains everything. The memories put tears to my eyes but I suppress them. The kiss is no longer salty. Now I feel subtle, very tempting bliss. For a while I wonder how far can I go. I don't let the body take control over me, I don't want to cross the permitted border even by a millimeter. I allow to lead me like a puppet. In fact I'm not sure at what my body aims. I haven't learnt yet how to live during these ten years. Kai has always focused on fighting, he didn't teach me to understand the basic instincts. I don't know neither how far the asari organism differs from human or whether I perceive the world in the same way. All my life so far I spent among people and presume that I adopted many customs of theirs. I guess as well that not all the people are like Kai and Layla. Scientists who created me represented a crave for power and I wouldn't expect them to give up no matter what. I feel lost in all of this because I don't really know who I am. Similarly, I don't know what's happening with me this very moment. My suspense embarrass me a bit. I shiver a little but it's kind of a nice feeling. However, my muscles are tense because of being nervous.

'Relax,' I hear in my ear gentle whisper. 'It's nothing extraordinary. Just... let your body act on its own. It knows perfectly how to behave.'

'But...'

'Don't be nervous. It's nothing extraordinary.'

I slowly even my breath and try to fade the unnecessary thoughts away. Maybe certain instincts act just automatically indeed?

I slowly relax and notice that body taking control over me guides my movements by itself. When Layla's delicate hands touch me, shivers are a bit more intense. I kiss her softly while undressing her in a slow manner. I understand now that this primal instinct concerns not only humans but every race as well as animals. I don't truly understand it because I haven't been gradually introduced to humans' or any other races' behaviors since childhood. I've never been a child. Finally it reached me that I don't have to understand everything. Sometimes it's just enough... to be. And now while I kiss and pet her, I start to realize that in fact it's nothing extraordinary. Later when I lie beside her and look at her sleeping, life seems so fabulous. I start to fear for my inability to leave her when the time comes. She'll handle it, I'm sure. But won't I go back from the intended path? Doubts take away from me the state of relief. Carefully, not to wake Layla up, I dress myself and leave the room. I remember the Kai's order. I managed to create biotic blades so I guess it's time to take what he wanted to give me. When I cross the threshold of his room, I'm afraid. I feel like I shouldn't disturb the peace of this place. Unsure I come closer to the wardrobe. I hesitate for a while with hand on the holder and then I open the door. There is a black light armor in there. Kai told me that biotics use them. Under the armor lie thick gloves without fingers at the same time appearing to be light. From beneath them protrudes a white sheet of paper. A letter? I reach it with my trembling arm. It's an ordinary white envelope addressed... to me. I open it and take out two pieces of paper. I notice that one of them is signed _For beloved Layla_. I put it away and take the unsigned sheet. Hands shiver without mercy but finally I get access to the content. I sit against the wall to get a comfortable position and start to read.

_Dear Aulis,_

_I write these words to you hoping that you would never have to read them.__However I must be sure that you'll know it in case something happened to me.__You've probably noticed the equipment I'd left for you.__Therefore I congratulate you for mastering the biotic blades.__Yes, I know you, Aulis.__You wouldn't act against my orders.__If you read this letter, you must have already the ability to wield this power.__Come on, smile now. I read you without a mistake, didn't I?_

_You're an incredibly talented biotic and now you have an irrefutable evidence for that.__Nobody except you have mastered that technique.__Don't show it to anyone and use it as a secret weapon when necessary.__The manipulation of the energy shape is your unique domain.__How do I know it?__I was one of the scientists creating you.__I was forced to do that under the threat of death.__Don't hold any grudge against me, boy, I wasn't in favor of this project.__It disturbed the whole harmony of the universe and could lead to an aimless war right in the aftermath of the previous one._

_Now I'll tell you the entire truth and hope that after reading this letter you won't hate me.__I saved you to recognize the ultimate secret of your power and destroy you for the good of the universe.__However when I was becoming acquainted to you I noticed that you're not aware of your enormous power.__You were innocent like a child and totally changed my initial plan.__I stopped treating you like a threat and sincerely loved you like a son.__I swear I wasn't acting in front of you even for a minute.__Now within you, I see hope for the better world.__I'm sorry that I hadn't appreciated you since the very beginning.__And I'm very sorry that I can't reverse the course of time.__I'm telling you that not to clear my conscience but to be truly honest with you._

_Now I'll pass on to a very important issue to me.__It isn't hard to notice that you're an apple in my beloved daughter's eye.__And, by the way, I was often jealous because of it.__Yes, smile now.__You love her much as well.__I can see it right away because you can't hide your emotions.__It's a good and ruinous trait at the same time.__Don't inhibit that feeling, otherwise you'll both suffer._

_Aulis, I know what kind of plan you're making in that pretty head of yours.__Don't smile this time.__You love her but you want to give up to ensure her safety and die restoring by the way the order of the universe.__I know that I probably won't stop you from doing it but you have to take into consideration one significant thing.__No matter if you find a suitable partner for her or not, her suffering will be as much destructive as if you'd be both alone.__It's an awfully stubborn girl, she won't let knock her feelings to you out of her head.__Therefore... although I know that I most likely talk to deaf ears but I beg you to avoid death as long as possible.__Don't read it as if I was doing it for you. I'm doing it only for her because she's the life to me.__The universe will cope with one male asari.__I'm aware that your life cycles are very different, therefore... if you love her, let her be with someone else but don't sentence her to suffering which would be your death.__Let her live to her end being close to you.__I'm sure that it's the best you can offer her.__I know that you won't listen to me, however I must try._

_I suppose that authors of the project intending to create you will soon be on my trail.__I don't stand a chance to survive encounter with them.__I want to warn you against them, those are pig-headed bastards who won't let go that easily and you're their target.__Don't run away if you won't have to and on no account can you look for them.__You won't cope with them.__I prepared this armor for you in case you had to fight.__The gloves will prevent the arm bleeding connected with using the blades.__However, I hope you won't need it all._

_I'm very happy that you're not entirely burning with revenge on those who called you into being.__You probably wonder why I'm still alive since I was among those scientists?__I was ousted from the last phase of the project because I started to act against it.__After all I stayed on the station.__Incognito because I wasn't allowed to be there officially.__But know that I never acted against you.__Well, almost never.__I thank you that you showed me that there are things more important than the harmony of the universe.__Take care of Layla, it's my last request.__Give her the second sheet, I also wrote a few words to her._

_Aulis... I know that you'll want to solve the mystery of your race but... be careful with that.__They won't welcome you warmly.__I understand your pursue after truth, I'd also like to know if I were you.__I'm sorry that indirectly I contributed to suffering you have to bear.__After all I truly believe in you.__Try not to forget about me too early.__And please, don't bear a grudge against me.__I wasn't thinking about my deeds since the beginning._

_Kai_

Already in half of the letter I'm thrilled with sobbing and tears fall on the paper. When I finish, I cover my face with hands and my whole body trembles. I have an impression that my head will soon fall into pieces. I'm tormented with contradictory thoughts and feelings. I'm completely incapable of coping with them. I'm sure of one thing. I'm in no way angry at that man. After all I know by myself that my existence is forced. But the shock caused by the fact that my mentor contributed to its creation tears me apart. I sit and dream about not feeling that terrible pain anymore. My head hurts so badly that my empty stomach writhes. I get tired alarmingly quickly and in the end I fall on the floor and fall asleep. Whole body is in terrible pain. I wake up and fall asleep by turns not having enough energy to arise. Anxious Layla finally rushes into the room.

'Auli...' she slowly approaches me.

She notices my even breath what soothes her. She probably notices the sheet of paper addressed to her. I want to get up to explain her everything but I'm too weak. I try to give any signal that I'll manage and everything's going to be okay but I fail despite the efforts. Dream grabs me strongly with its arms and I stop to fight.

When I wake up, I don't open my eyes yet. The ground is so wonderfully soft that I want to fall asleep again but something tells me that I shouldn't because I've already slept enough. I slowly raise my eyelids and the light dazzles painfully. The eyes get accustomed to the brightness. I don't know how much time has passed but I have a feeling that I've slept for a very long time. Is it possible that it was days again?

I look around but I'm completely by myself in the room. Most likely Layla had to go somewhere or take care of something. However something's wrong, I get a strange, bad feeling. I get up slowly to take a look in the house. Everything's as usual. But I don't see the girl. It surprises me a bit because she always bravely watches over me when I feel bad. In the end I get to a conclusion that she simply had to consider me safe and go out. I catch myself trying to making myself believe in it instead of having a strong conviction. I greatly hope that everything's okay but truly I start to worry. Finally I decide to wait one day. Only twenty-four hours and then... no... I don't even want to think about it.

I wander around without aim being powerless. Hours pass incredibly slowly but they pass indeed. The girl doesn't show up. I start to be horribly frightened. When the night comes, I stay awake all the time. I'm tired but I don't let myself to sleep. I slowly begin to lose hope, the breath accelerates, I shudder a little. There's ten hours left. But what will I do if she doesn't come back? After all looking for her will be too difficult. If someone kidnapped her, they could take her literally anywhere. The universe is huge, too huge. Finally I realize that if I had to look for her, I must work according to a certain plan. To keep the mind busy I prepare to the possible journey. I know that's not as if I shatter the chance for her return but I have to be ready for an instant action. In principle I don't know what to begin with. It's obvious that not with the authors of the project who brought me to life. To tell the truth, it's very likely that they looked for me but the worse thing in all of it is the fact that they can be anywhere now. I don't even know in which system should I search. However Kai mentioned once that most representatives of the asari race settled down on Illium. Though I don't think that they're responsible for it but I have a starting point. It may always turn out that I'll find there some useful information which will help me out. Nevertheless, the destination cheers me up somehow. I don't know at all how could I get there. After all I don't have a vehicle, Kai didn't leave anything either. There's a port nearby but I can't get there without revealing my true identity. The enthusiasm wanes quickly and I beg forces majeures to bring Layla back before time passes. I have a light headache. I catch myself almost constantly blinking. I acknowledge that I can't ignore forever those bizarre symptoms occurring time after time. I begin to suspect that something didn't work out. That the experiment didn't go as expected. I don't feel good. Yet I constantly put down the blame to a untamed fear. What will I do if she doesn't come back? I don't want to sit idly but I'm aware of the fact that escaping the Earth will be almost impossible. I need an ally. One person who won't treat me like an outsider...

I don't even notice when I fall asleep. I wake up and I know that there's no hope. The house is still empty. The awareness that now the dearest person's life is up to me nearly knocks me off my feet. I breathe deeply to control sickness. The forehead's covered with beads of sweat. So it's time for action. Saving Layla is now up to me. But... how am I supposed to do that?

I stroll in the house to gather thoughts. By the way I look for something of use to me. I put on the armor prepared for me by Kai. I know I'm going to need it. However I can't do anything about my appearance. Whether I want it or not, I'm the only one of that kind in the universe and there are many who'd like to be the ones to take my life away. But now I mustn't die. Not yet, until I make sure that nothing threatens the girl, I must live. Anyway, that's not enough. I need my peak form and recently it was quite a problem for me. I often fainted, vomited and lost strength. That's the last thing I need now. I heard once that the motivation can strengthen like nothing else. That's why I think that I'll manage. Lost in thoughts I step on something soft. I pick up the object and look. I hold in my hand a long deep hooded coat. I can't believe my luck. Frankly, it may not be fully effective but it'll partly help me hide my identity, at least superficially. From a distance nobody should recognize me or at least should consider me a typical asari at first glance. Feeling bit more confident I gather the rest of necessary things, including provisions for a couple of days and I leave the house. I stop for a while and look behind me. I have a strange feeling that I won't come back here anymore.

After several minutes already I realize that I don't know where I'm going to. I haven't become acquainted with the world apart from that weird laboratory and then Kai and Layla's house with that small practice glade. I don't know how should I behave, who should I ask and what should I ask for. I learnt that basically I can trust no one because I'm totally different. I try to establish the direction I should head for but nothing comes to my mind. I strive to remember what Kai told me once about.

–_'If you ever have to leave this place, follow the setting Sun.'_

Supposedly I know it. But... I lack self-confidence. I clench my fists and start to run. Come what may, at least I have to try. After all it concerns the person who is closest to me and I can't surrender because of my thoughtless ignorance.

When I finally reach the port, I'm exhausted. I'm out of provisions and haven't eaten for a day. I'm out of water too. I heard though that the port areas are full of shops and citizens from all over the universe, therefore I decide to go shopping when the opportunity occurs. However, from this moment I intensify vigilance. There's too many creatures from which I have to cover my face. I look around to better know the surroundings but I don't see much through ubiquitous crowds. Nevertheless, the crowd encourages me. Everyone seems to be self-absorbed and my presence appears to be something very usual. Finally I decide to walk around the port and look for useful things but the moment I make my first step something runs into me vigorously and I only hear loud-voiced:

'Oh fuck!'

I fall down and terrified feel that the hood slides from my head. I quickly pull it on again but I know perfectly that the person who knocked me down, saw clearly my face. I feel horror-stricken, what will happen now? Sudden pull and that person puts me back on my feet.

'Come. And don't you dare to look around. And just try to attack... you'll have more than me up your ass.'

I obediently follow the stranger. Breath accelerates, I can't see clearly. After a while I'm pinned to a wall with a strong hit. Now I see the aggressor's face. Although outwardly similar, he's not a human. His face brings to mind a crossbreed of human and reptile. It has bluish-green color and despite facial features are humanoid, it's very distinct from human. Sharp edges protruding from behind not a bit reminds of hair. Head looks bald. When the stranger blinks twice, I notice that the coal black eyes are bordered with two pair of eyelids. They close by turns horizontally and vertically what gives me creeps. A strong shoulder keeps me beside the wall. On the neck I notice the contour of muscles. I haven't seen yet someone like him.

'What the hell are you?' His voice is hoarse. Sharp, nearly drills a hole in my head but sounds young.

I catch my breath but can't pronounce a word.

'Answer me!'

'Aulis... my name's Aulis.'

'I don't give a shit about your name! What are you?'

'A-asari.'

The boy moves back by a step and looks at me a bit afraid. Then he comes up and with one move throws off the hood from my head. He watches me as if he didn't believe his eyes. Then I notice that his look softens.

'Put on the hood and come with me. You stand out as hell.'

I don't intend to oppose. After all I don't know what to do. He leads me through side passages. In the end we leave the port area. Exhausted by the long journey I fall down on the ground without energy. I expect that he leaves me here, however he bends down and grabs my arm.

'We're nearly there.'

He helps me walk supporting me with his body. I try to reject that feeling but I'm full of hope. Doesn't he want to kill me? Is he the one to help me? Eventually we reach a small house. He pushes me in and seats on a sofa.

'Wait here,' he orders. 'And don't you dare to move. Besides... you can't do it anyway.'

He returns with food and water. He puts it in front of me on a table. I look distrustfully at the meal. I don't know if it's poisoned but on the other hand my body craves it so badly.

'Eat, you'll feel better. I'm not gonna poison you... yet.'

He sits against me and observes me attentively. I gobble down everything from the plate at a fast rate. The stranger looks at me for a while and then asks a question.

'You're asari... then explain to me, how come you're born a man?'

I gulp not knowing what to say. What can I lose?

'I wasn't born. I was created in a result of an experiment.'

'Oh...'

My doubtful savior seems to be perplexed.

'In what purpose were you created?'

'I don't know that. I killed scientists who created me. Not being entirely conscious. Rather because of the will of survival. I awakened an incredible fury and I couldn't stop. I don't know why I was created but I know what I have to do now. If you stop me... I'll have to kill you too.'

'Don't be ridiculous. I can always do that first but... if you tell me what's your goal, I can consider helping you.'

I hesitate, my heart beats quickly. I shouldn't trust him so easily but... that's exactly what I need. An ally who will help me.

'I...' I answer slowly. 'A woman who is my dearest friend who... I love, she... was probably kidnapped. Because of me. I need to find her. No matter what.'

'But how do you know where to and who took her?'

'I don't know but... I have to start somehow. It could be other asari and, from what I know, I can find most of them on Illium. And there... I can look for information. I'll somehow get to it, I have to. Just, may she be alive.'

The boy smiles a little crossing his legs.

'I'm Kolyat. Kolyat Krios.'

And he offers his hand. For a moment I hesitate but I shake hands.

'Does it mean... that you'll help me?'

'Sure. It can be quite a fun. To walk with someone who's wanted by half of the universe? It can't be boring.'

He laughs looking at me.

'So what's the plan?'

'To get somehow on Illium but... first, tell me, who are you anyway?'

'Me? I'm a drell, it's obvious at first glance, isn't it?'

'A drell?'

'Come on, you haven't seen a drell? Well, okay. Fact is that there aren't many of us on Earth. Drells... basically majority of us live in peace with hanars because our natural environment was destroyed with most of the population. Those who survived were taken in by hanars and took over their customs or even religion. But my father, for instance, still professes drell polytheistic rites. But me... I don't believe in anything, that's all. I intended to be an assassin but my father prevented me from walking this path. He behaves as if he knew everything and he himself kills on commission...'

'Probably it's because he thinks the world of you and doesn't want you to be responsible for that later on,' I interrupt him, 'you have a good father, Kolyat.'

'Okay, quit that claptrap. You're boring, asari boy. In any case... I worked for over a year in C-Sec in Citadel. It was boring so I begged the old Bayley for relief. The negotiations went on for a long time because of course he had to consult my daddy. Finally, when I swore solemnly that I won't kill unless forced to, I was allowed to do what I want. And somehow... I got here. No matter how. It matters that I am.'

'And drells... their organisms... generally how long do you live?'

'Normally, like humans. Apart from those suffering from Kepral's Syndrome like my old man. They usually decease pretty quickly.'

'What kind of illness is that?'

'If a drell is exposed to a strong damp climate, he may fall ill. It's quite often on Kahje, it can't offer good conditions. Our species got used to rather desert climates. Actually, a sick organism is incapable of distributing the oxygen to organs and die soon after. It's not contagious but there's no cure for it. Hanars work on genetic adaptation but nothing's certain.'

'And you father suffer from this?'

'Yes, I suppose he'll die soon if he's not dead already.'

'You have a light approach to it.'

'And what can I do? I've never been with him on good terms so why regret that? There's no helping it anyway, they won't heal him. The die is cast.'

I wanted to believe that at heart he's sorry for all of it. Both the lost time and the certain death of his father. However his light-hearted attitude towards the case denied it so intensely that it scared me. Does this... drell, his father, is so indifferent to him?

'How many years do you live when you're healthy?' I ask trying not to tremble my voice overmuch.

'I've said already, more or less like humans. About 85 years, sometimes more, sometimes less, it depends.'

My body shivers unwillingly. I don't trust him yet, oh no. Nevertheless, if I could entrust Layla's safety to someone, it would probably be Kolyat. The fact alone that he wants to help me for nothing in exchange means a lot to me but at the same time he looks suspicious. Maybe my distrust lies in the fact that humans wanted to use me as a tool to achieve their goals. After all that's what I was created for. However this drell wants to help me not imposing any conditions. Maybe he's trustworthy?

'Hey,' he takes me out from deep thought, 'd'you have something... that could show me that girl? A vid or pic?'

'Ah... yes, I have.'

I draw out the only thing I took from the house beside food. I feel a bit uncomfortable because it's a private Layla's holodiary. I haven't watched it yet because I didn't feel like it. However I'm aware that Kolayt should know who are we saving. I put the set and uncertainly play the last entry. When the hologram appears with beloved face, tears get stuck in my throat.

_'I can't believe,'_ I hear, _'It finally happened.__Me and Auli... ah, he's so in love.__I know he'll take good care of me but... I miss dad.__However I don't have to cry, I don't want to.__I know Auli's gonna look after me.__I'll help him find asari.__It'll be such an adventure!__I can't wait to it.'_

I can't stand it anymore and close the entry. I breathe heavily to hold tears. When I eventually calm down, I look at drell's face. It has a strange expression or it seems to me like this because he's usually so self-confident and a bit arrogant and now... he seems astonished and... maybe sad?

'Her father's dead?' he asks.

'Yes. He died... not so long ago. Or rather was murdered. It was weird because he'd seemed to know what awaited him. He left me this.' I hand him the piece of paper I found in the wardrobe.

'Wait... a letter?' Kolyat starts to laugh, 'I'm sorry but... In twenty-second century he writes to you... a letter?'

'But... what's so funny about it?'

'How did he come by a piece of paper? Though you use only datapads now.'

'Is it important? Look what he wrote there.'

For a moment I look how he's concentrated reading the message, then I start to go round the room.

'So that's how it is,' I hear finally, 'he's got nerve but in the end he did the right thing...'

'He was like father to me!' - I parry maybe a bit too aggressively.

'Okay, okay. I don't go into details. Why, I have a quite clear image of the situation. Now we have to at least draw a partial plan of the mission.'

'Kolyat, wait. How old are you anyway?'

'Geez, d'you have an age complex or something? The fact that you are hundred twenty doesn't mean that you're old, it's going differently in your case, isn't it? Let it be so, I'll tell you. I don't know what's your purpose but I'm twenty-one. Happy? So now go take a shower, then we'll think what to do. If we make haste, we'll set out tomorrow already.'

I notice that the whole time I obey his orders. I don't trust him much but feeling such a strong footing, I yield easily. Kolyat's twenty-one. I felt relieved because it means that he'll be able to take care of Layla. So my mission will be easier to accomplish. Hot water relieves my body but I stay vigilant the whole time. When I look in the mirror, I notice first slight changes in my appearance. Facial features are a bit more sharp, shape and expression of the eyes have also slightly changed. I watch them for a while. Their expression seems to be sharper and kinder at a time. I look a bit older but not to tell that the changes are meaningful. However seeing that time has its effect on me too, I feel greatly relieved. When I leave the bathroom, I see Kolyat in a deeply pensive state. Not wanting to draw his attention, I sit on the floor beside the wall. I got into that habit. The floor became very comfortable for me wherever I was. I quickly lose myself in thought. Everything that has happened seems totally unreal, it's all too fast. In one moment my mentor, Layla's father dies and then she herself disappears. Too much, simply too much. I'm not able to comprehend it all anymore. It would've been probably better if I had died on that station right after my "birth".

'Hey,' I don't notice that Kolyat sits past me. 'what's wrong?'

'Hm? Ah, no, nothing. I got lost in contemplation, that's all.'

'Too much at the same time, huh?'

'Yeah... too much...'

'Don't worry, we'll put an end to all of it. It'll be fine.'

I gulp.

'Kolyat, I have a request for you.'

'Well? But please, without teary thanks and "in exchange for, I will"...'

'Take care of Layla when we find her, okay?'

'... wait... what the hell are you saying? You love her, right? That's why I want to help you, moron, and you're talking such heresies? Oh no, in that case not only I won't help you but also murder you with utter pleasure! So think well about what you've said!'

'Kolyat... we both know that my existence is forced. It can't last forever. It shouldn't last at all. Besides... I can't be with her. Our life cycles differ too greatly. I won't grow old with her, I... I can't, I just can't.'

I hit the floor with a fist, pain cruelly makes me realize that I'm alive.

'Wait, are you...' the drell looks at me with a hysterical disbelief.

I confirm with a nod.

'You know... I wonder whether you love her that much or you're that stupid. You'll give her away? Just like that?'

'Not just like that. I don't have any other option. I want her to be happy. And she won't be happy with me.'

My new comrade looks down. The anger clearly disappears.

'Why d'you ask me for that?'

'Because I think you're the only person I can trust.'

'Where comes that certainty from?'

'I don't have any but I don't have time as well. It's the only reasonable way out I can take into consideration right now. You only have to promise me... that you'll make her happy.'

'Therefore you're so interested in the life of drells. You planned it since the beginning, right? But even if... why d'you think that I'll fall in love in her?'

'When we were looking at her holo-diary, your facial expression told me everything so you won't wriggle out of it.'

'Oh...'

He clenches his fists and looks down. Did I get the soft spot? However after a while he smiles a bit and says looking at me:

- 'Don't be ridiculous. But I'll help you. And I promise that I won't let her die right after you save her. Now go get some sleep. In the morning you're to be ready, it won't be easy.'

He stands up and leaves raising his right hand. I don't have to look to know that he smiles.

I instantly regretted this decision. In fact it's not something I'd like to do. After all starting the mission doesn't make me afraid even a little. I know that the job is dirty. It'll require killing because there's surely no getting to the target without resistance. I'm not surprised by the fact that killing people doesn't fill me with disgust. Moral inhibitions are inexistent. I killed several scientists. My "parents". I don't regret even a little. Perhaps they wanted me to do it. I was supposed to be a killing machine and I'll be one. To a certain extent. I know that I can't wait anymore. Looking for Layla will take much time. Basically I don't know how much. I have plenty of it but she... she may be dead already. I catch myself thinking about the fact that I'm hoping in a way for her to be dead. It would make me sure that she's not suffering and... I'm ashamed to admit it but I'm becoming sick with jealousy. I fancy about her being dead and loving me rather than alive with Kolyat or whoever else. The thoughts rush and I'm closer and closer to resigning. However when I start to consider the second option... in which she's being tortured in order to get information about me I know that I have to find her. Even dead. May she be dead?

The plan's simple. Get any transport. Under one condition - exclusively for us. Kolyat leads me through paths which he apparently knows very well.

- 'Do you have any idea where to look for them?' I ask being full of doubts.

- 'You met the right man because I have. You yourself had a good one. Illium is one large concentration of asari. However that wasn't enough for them. They created a station nearby. There they are most numerous. If your suppositions are right, we'll find the girl there.'

After that short dialog we go further without a word, focusing on the goal. A crowd of many creatures starts to thin. When we pass main docking stations, it's totally empty. Drell points with a slight finger's move at a small shuttle guarded by two robust batarians. There was nobody else around what was conductive to accomplish the task. Witnesses would be more than unwelcome. Dressed in a black coat I'm almost unnoticeable. I have face covered with scarf up to the eyes. The room is dark. With no difficulties I sneak silently behind the back of one of the opponents. I plunge the point of the blade in his neck. Nearly at the same time a shot was fired. Both batarians fall on the ground. I look at the face of one of them for a while. Both pairs of eyes remain closed. There's a lot of edgings on the head. Two tiny holes gape from where nose should be. Most of the attention draws his mouth open in an expression of an infinite astonishment.

- 'You intend to meditate here or shall we pack our asses on the shuttle already?' my ally's voice indicates a deep irritation.

- 'You've had enough of all this?'

- 'Yes, I have. Therefore stop admiring your killing art and come. Let's get that farce over with.'

I pass by the bodies of creatures without protest and head to the small vessel. There's space for only four people. It's more than enough for us. Dark, compact room evokes a weird reaction. My head's spinning. I sit on one of two available benches and even the breath. I look at Kolyat professionally operating all the electronics. At the sight of such an amazing number of controls and consoles in such a small interior I feel dizzier. After a short while the door close and the sound of starting engine can be heard.

- 'Well, those tiny ships are damn fast,' drell says turning around to look at me. 'The travel will only take us twenty-three hours.'

- 'It's few?'

- 'Very few. It would take three days in the case of a typical cruiser. I'll take care of everything, you just relax meanwhile. You have not much time left for that.'

- 'How d'you think, what's the chance that she's there?'

- 'The same as in the case of all other parts of the universe. Or at least this galaxy. In other words, very little, but I have a strange feeling that she'll be there.'

- 'It would be great. I'm also tired already.'

- 'Still desperately wanting to die?'

- 'Yes, it's the only thing left for me after saving her. To find the desired peace at last. Universe has its laws which are in force.. There's no place for those who break them.'

- 'But you didn't break them.'

- 'It doesn't matter anyway. It wouldn't do any good so... it'll be better that way.'

- 'You're weird but I won't be disturbing your twisted logic. Or rather lack of any logic. I'm not your friend or anything like this so I won't mourn after you.'

- 'Very well.'

My mouth stagnate in a slight smile, when I fall asleep.. It's excessively calm as if it was prejudged that all will be finished within the forthcoming several dozen hours.

When I wake up, I look at the drell.

- 'You have sense,' he smiles slightly. 'Only about an hour left. Start preparing psychically that we'll find her or not. Try not to be overly disappointed if the second option will prove true. Unfortunately, whether you like it or not, it's as probable as the first one. In any case, remember this. We don't attack without need. First, we have to check if they know anything.'

- 'I think I know it, however I wish it was all over already.'

- 'I have a feeling that it'll be over. Something's telling me that.'

When we reach the place I notice that I'm not afraid. I realize that basically I have nothing to lose. However we're quite surprised that they're not on the offensive when we dock our shuttle. All my senses sharpen. Have we been awaited?

We go from the docks to a spacious corridor. I look straight in the face of the representative of my race. I wasn't expecting confrontation so quickly and I'm surprised to notice that I feel quite perplexed. I look in the face of a woman of the same color of skin, the same organism. I'm overwhelmed by strong emotions. I feel sudden wish to touch her, feel what it is like to belong. My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a beautiful, melodic voice.

- 'Welcome. We've been expecting your arrival. Our little, lost brother.'

These words totally confuse me. I'm afraid.

- 'We have what you're looking for. However, it won't be easy for you to regain it because it doesn't depend only on your will, brother.'

Hands clench unintentionally. I don't know what my next step should be. I don't feel the presence of Kolyat anymore but I don't have the courage to turn and check where he is.

- 'I must take you to my sisters now. Don't resist. You're on our territory and don't have any advantage.'

She turns around and begins to walk slowly.

- 'Come with me.'

Legs are heavy but I obey the order.

- 'Reasonable,' I hear the familiar drell's voice.

I'm quite relieved and steps become lighter.

Finally we enter a large round chamber without any furniture or other elements. Apart from the little gap for the door the room is surrounded by asari. I enter uncertain and only after a moment I notice distinctive against the other, dressed in white robes human figure. My Layla. I refrain from any reaction. I know that it could be dangerous. I try to pretend that I don't notice her at all but my heart's beating like crazy. So she's alive. She looks down, her face is nearly without any expression.

- 'Sisters,' speaks the woman who was my guide. 'The day has come. The day we can finally confront the abomination we've been disgraced by the human race. That's him, the only male of our race.'

I hear ominous grumbles among the crowd. I quickly try to assess our chances. To tell the truth, we have none, therefore I know I'll have to draw all the attention to myself so that Kolyat can take Layla from here and run as soon as possible. All must happen in less than a minute.

- 'Do you, like me, consider him worthy only of a cruel death? Do you, dear sisters, think that the balance in the universe must be preserved? We must not allow that plague to disperse any further!'

I notice that I can't move regardless of my will. Apparently their abilities block my movements. I know that the verdict is prejudged. Eager chanting explains everything to me.

- 'The one to be the first to execute that monster will be lavishly rewarded!'

Suddenly the odd force immobilizing my body is released. I try to put out all the thoughts and throw into the fight. I focus on the gathering the power in the arms, by all means striving not to panic. I succeed, biotic blades appear at my arms. Their power is painful even for me. I don't know what they'd do to me without the Kai's armor. Their blue edges don't leave a shadow of doubt about their sharpness. I don't think too long. I'll kill as much blue-skinned so similar to me creatures as required. There's no illusions about it, my chances are minimal and I know well that my journey ends here. I clench hands in order to gain better control over the weapon. I take deep breath and lunge forward. First strike belongs to me. The surprised asari haven't managed to defend herself. Some of them try to shoot with pistols but I reflect all the projectiles. Kolyat repeatedly shoots the asari that are close to me. I hear laser beams flying next to my ears. It's too easily. Blue women fall dead one after another. Sometimes my weapon cut them to halves. I turn my head right and notice a group of a dozen or so coming my way. I pull out my arms diagonally and start to spin quickly to create a line of defending edges. That method turned out to be great, there's not many foes left in the room. When Kolayt finishes off two asari running towards me, my left arm hits something hard. Without turning around I strike one more time, but stronger. The blade slices soft body. A sigh from that direction makes me look behind. I'm petrified watching that Layla falls on the ground holding a broken bio-spear in her hands. A deep cut just below her breast extends nearly from side to side. I quickly fall to my knees keeping her up and leaning against my legs.

- 'Why?' speaking isn't easy for me. 'Why have you come to the blade? You know it's dangerous!'

- 'I didn't want to come to the blade.' Her strong voice surprises me. 'I wanted to kill you.'

I feel as if I was hit in the head with a hammer. The voice is stuck in my throat.

- 'You shouldn't have lived. Everybody knew that. My father above all.'

Great pain's shown on her face but she continues.

- 'He poisoned you when others weren't watching. Before you'd awake... you'd have been dead. But you awoke too early. And your organism... was too strong, it was gradually overcoming its effect. Therefore you were feeling bad, passing out and throwing up. I silently prayed for your death so many times. My hatred grew but I pretended to love you. Through all these years of my life... dad slowly taught me various things. He showed me what to do to destroy you. I wanted you to die with all my heart, especially after my father's death. But...'

She coughs. Blood spills out of her mouth. I sit like paralyzed not being able to say a word or move.

- '... but you were so stupid, so naïve and... so mindlessly infatuated... that in the end didn't know what I actually wanted myself. That's why I escaped to this place, to persevere in what I wanted to do. But now... I'm dying... still not knowing what I really want. Torment me no more. Please, die.'

She closes her eyes slowly, head drops aside.

I start to shiver. I'm freezing.. I can't catch my breath.

- 'Okay, enough.' The drell's voice reaches me as if from a distance. 'An order is an order.'

A moment later my chest is pierced by a projectile. The brain doesn't manage to register that fact. It's accompanied by no thoughts. I fall down. My ears catch only the quiet:

- 'After all it's a pity but... an order is an order.'

I'm being engulfed in darkness and silence which nearly brings relief.


End file.
